Date: 28 Nov 1994 From: LoNG JoHN Subject: *** Adama Meets Q!!! It's finally here *** ____________________________________________________________________ |_| ` . |_| |_| /~~\ |~~~\ /~~\ |~\ /~| /~~\ * `. QQQQQQQQQQQ |_| |_| |____| | \ |____| | \/ | |____| . QQ QQ |_| |_| | | |____| | | | | | | * Q Q |_| |_| _____ _____ _______ ____ ~ Q Q |_| |_| |~\ /~| | | | /' ~ Q QQ Q |_| |_| | \/ | |----- |----- | `-----, * QQ QQ QQ |_| |_| | | |_____ |_____ | _____/ ` QQQQQQQQQQQ ` |_| |_| ` . * ` . * . ` * QQ . |_| |_|` * . . By Arek Wdowiak . .` * ` * . ` . |_| |_|________________________________________________________________|_| Adama paced around the command center of the Galactica nervously, back and forth, back and forth. Everyone was getting the impression that a trough would form in the armored deck soon if he didn't stop. Tigh couldn't take it anymore. "What's wrong Commander?" he asked. "Oh nothing, just walking around." he replied. "You're nervous, aren't you?" pressed Tigh. "Who me? NERVOUS? Never." answered Adama innocently, and promptly tripped and fell. Omega rushed to his side and helped him up. "All right! SO I have this feeling that something is going to happen. It's been nagging me all day. Does that answer your question?' "Can you be more specific? asked Tigh. "I can't, but I think it will be something we will never forget." "Oh great, another one of those..." teased Omega, then saw the look on Adama's face and quickly turned to his station, typing away furiously. "Don't worry about it, I'll be-" Adama tried to say. He was interrupted by a sudden, bright flash on the center podium which blinded everyone for an instant, and as soon as their sight returned, they saw a figure standing there. He was dressed in the robes of a Kobellian Lord, an ancient ruler of the civilization from which humanity sprung. "Barbaric warriors!" he called. "Those who do not live by the Word, those who hath betrayed the Gods, those who pursue unpure quests, return from where thou hath cometh, lest the wrath of the universe befall on you all!". "Omega, call Apollo up here and a couple of guards now!" ordered Adama. "Who are you? What are you talking about? And by the Lords of Kobol, how did you get in here?" The being looked at Adama and then at himself. "Whoops, sorry! Wrong era!". He snapped his fingers, and the robes were replaced by an early Colonial uniform at the time of the start of the Great War. He cleared his throat. "As I was saying, You are all barbarians, uncivilized warriors, doing nothing but interfering in the natural order of the clockwork-like universe. Return from where you came from! This part of your galaxy doesn't need any more of your chaos!". "Barbarians? I think not! We are Colonial warriors from the Great Colonies!" proclaimed Tigh with Adama's approval, "determined in our quest to defeat the evil Cylons!" "HA! It's your fault that this war started in the first place! You claim to be civilized? I represent those who started the war! Don't you remember? How you interfered with the Cylons and their master plan to maintain peace and harmony in the universe? How you kept on fighting for that so-called freedom and justice and did it for others to prolong your little game?" he challenged. "That was over 1000 yahrens ago! Things have changed since then" responded Adama angrily. "Oh sorry." Another flash, and this time the being was wearing the uniform of a battlestar commander. In fact, it was identical to Adama's. The being looked at it approvingly. "1000 yarhen's ago? Oh, so that's what the use to tell time in this part of the galaxy. OK, so be it. 1000 yahrens ago you interfered with the Great Cylon Empire. You proclaimed your glorious defense of peaceful species against their enlightenment. In short, you didn't mind your own business. The Cylons got mad. You are a dangerous little bunch. Stay here and confine your evil ways." "WHO ARE YOU?" blasted Adama. Apollo just arrived with Boomer and Starbuck and saw the being. "Having visitors Commander?" he asked. "Hardly," replied Adama. "Who are you?" he pressed "We are the Q. The great beings of the universe." "Do you come from the ship of lights?" asked Adama. "Oh those impostors? You actually fell for THAT? " Q broke out in laughter. "I can't believe it! Not even Picard is that gullible!" "Who is Picard? Another member of the Q" "HIM? No! He's just a puny little human. Quite interesting to watch too. As I said, I am a member of the Q continuum. You may call me Q." "Is Picard from Earth? There really was a 13th tribe? Where?" demanded Apollo. "Whoops, sorry! I gave too much away. I must really learn to watch my Prime Directive. Crude document, but I suppose it was one of those Earthling's greater achievements. At least THEY know when to stay away from other people's affairs. You certainly don't. In spite of repeated protests and threats from the Great Cylons you still insisted on fighting for others in the name of peace in spite of never being invited into the game. Tsk tsk." "If had earned that uniform and rank, you would have know that that's not what really happened er...Q!" responded Adama. "This primitive means of identification? My dear Adama, I have gone beyond what you call knowledge" was the arrogant reply. "You keep mentioning Earth and people living on it, including this Picard. Can you show us the way? Can you take us there? Please, we have been travelling for so long, our supplies are running low, the Cylons follow us at-" "Save your meaningless whimpers. My job here is to keep you away from Earth. Humanity has made great progress since the genetic tyrants of the late 1990's. Whoops, I did it again! Darn! Anyway, they don't need more problems from you and those pesky Cylons to ruin their day. Besides, they have enough problems of their own without your violence and endless combat." "How can you assure us of being violent? We have been led into this war by the Cylons who want to destroy all living beings? How can we negotiate peacefully with them? Fighting is not all we do?" "Then why has this war lasted for over 1000 yahrens?" "Because we never fully committed ourselves. We don't believe in total annihilation, only tactical defeat. We spent the rest of the time developing our societies and cultures, with full emphasis on the fine arts and technology as well as personal enlightenment." "Oh, so that's why you built a fleet of vessels large enough to demolish whole planets, only to be tripped by the stupidest lie I have ever seen about a peace treaty, to have your colonies attacked and the fleet torn to shreds, so that your 'enlightened people', or should I say those overweight Buriticians can hoard their treasures and flee? How am I doing?" "By the Lords of Kobol that's not how it happened? How can you put down humanity in such a manner?" "Easy, I'm a god. Or at least that's as close a term as you have or me." "THAT'S It! I've heard enough. Commander, I beg you! Let me throw him out the nearest launch tube!" boomed Boomer. "Silence!" exclaimed Q. With a flick of his wrist, the bridge became ice cold and in an instant Boomer froze solid and toppled to the ground. Apollo and Starbuck lunged to break his fall. "Barbarian! What have you done?" cried Adama. "Easy, he's alright. He was just being rude. I'll restore him in a second" replied Q with boredom. "You say we are barbarians. Yet you don't behave any better. Freezing people for no apparent reason is clearly a violent act." challenged Adama. "Adama, you are an intellectual man also. Good! Picard would like you! You could sit all day...er Sentari and debate huge volumes. Then he would show you his fish and you could impress him with your little daggit and its tricks. Tempting. Maybe I SHOULD show you the way..." "Please Q." "SORRY! That would be violating the Prime Directive," he smiled. "This is something you must do on your own. Tell you what, I'll make you a deal." "What might that be?" "I'll observe you for a while, you behavior and actions, and if you truly are a peaceful, life-respecting species and not those space cases from 100 yahrens ago, I'll help you find Earth." "Q, what is it you're saying?" asked Omega. "I'm putting your part of the human race on trial, just as I have done with Earth. They pleaded guilty and so far Picard's doing his best to convince the judge, the Q Continuum, that we should let them survive because of how much they have improved and all that. Think you can do the same?" he looked suspiciously at Adama. "How long will this observation period last Q?" asked Adama. "You don't get it! The trial never ends. As long as there is humanity there is the argument that they are irrational, violent beings who cause nothing but havoc. I can't just let you slack off and return to your old ways now, can I?" "Suppose we accept. How will you help us?" asked Tigh. "Well first you will be allowed to continue existing. Then I will provide you with clues as to Earth's location. Don't look so disappointed! That's also part of your test. You say you are intellectually advanced, then this should be no problem. These clues will help you to determine whether you're going in the right direction, or which direction to go and all that." "What about the Cylons?" asked Apollo. "My boy, what about them? You colonial warriors are all fond of showing off how powerful you are, like you did to the Eastern Alliance. Besides, you've survived against them for 1000 years. You can keep them off a little longer. Earth will be happy to help you. They help everyone. " "Very well. Then we accept this challenge Q. We have been travelling for yahrens, and our children must walk upon the soil of a planet once again. This will be an excellent opportunity to learn about ourselves, but we will show you that all those accusations you made about us are false, so you may be disappointed," answered Adama confidently. "Just like Picard. Very well, from this point on your humanity is on trial. But you better be on your best behavior, because I'm not a patient god. You don't think I'll just hand over Earth, do you?" "What's that supposed to mean?" asked Adama. Q leaned over to him as if to answer, but changed his mind at the last second. "You'll find out. In the meantime, you have work to do. Your first test awaits you. Don't mess it up! I'll be watching you. And if you're lucky, maybe I'll stop by once in a while and pay you a visit." With that, he snapped his fingers and was literally gone in a flash. Our Heroes were mesmerized. Boomer thawed out and sat up. He was completely dry and unaware that anything happened. All around them bridge activity continued as if nothing happened. In fact, when Apollo checked his chronograph he discovered that time did not pass during his visit with Q, as if everything around them was frozen during their "discussion" "Father, what do you supposed Q meant about the challenge?" asked Apollo. "By the Lords I do not know Apollo. But we'll pass it. After all, we got this far, how bad can it get? Besides, maybe we'll never see him again," smiled Adama. At his last word, one of the central station's comm screens came on and the figure displayed was familiar. "I heard that Adama. You voice carries." He smiled and the screen winked out. Omega looked shocked. "Commander!" exclaimed a bridge officer. "Advance patrol reports the star system we picked up ahead has 6 planets, 1 capable of supporting life... AND THE TEST BEGINS... Arek Wdowiak