"Jolly Forgot the Kids" - Episode 276 Scene: The landing bay of the Celestra, the electronics ship, where Vipers traditionally stop to have their equipment checked. Nothing funny about it. Nope, nope, nope. Kronus never allowed anything funny. Well, actually, it was Charka who never allowed it, but he always told everybody that it was Kronus who gave the order, so everybody believed Kronus was the one with no sense of humor. If you don't believe me, just ask Aurora. If you dare. If you've got half a star system between you. If you're willing to take your life in your hands.... Apollo: (Clambering out of his ship, which has just landed.) Hello, out there! Damon: (Appearing out of a side corridor, looking sulky.) Who is it this time? Darn pilots.... Apollo: It's me. Damon: I can see that. Apollo: Then why did you ask? Damon: Darn pilots. What do you want? Apollo: My ship needs to be checked out. Damon: Hmm, I think we can get you penciled in next Tuesday.... Apollo: I can't wait until Tuesday, it has to be done now! Damon: Why? Apollo: Because I have to go on a quest for Starbuck, and I have to leave right away! Damon: A quest for Starbuck? Oh, goody! In that case, how about a week from Wednesday? Apollo: Make it now, and that's an order! My father's orders! I'll be right back, I have to go to the bridge and see if there's any updated information on Starbuck's location. Damon: (Muttering under his breath.) Darn pilots.... [Aurora enters the bay just as Apollo is about to leave, while Damon ducks under the Viper nose and performs some quick work.] Aurora: (Sounding annoyed.) Hello, Captain Apollo. On a mission? Apollo: Of course. I'm going to find and bring back Starbuck. Aurora: Hmph! Well, when you're done tracking down Starbuck, do you think you could do something about your other friend Jolly and his kids? Apollo: What did they do this time? Aurora: You don't want to know - but you can tell him this for me, I'm never flying shuttle for him again! I mean, Starbuck won't even fly a shuttle for him anymore, and after doing it once, I can see why! Starbuck won't do it again, and neither will I! Damon: (Calling.) Finished! Apollo: That was quick! Damon: You said you were in a hurry. After all, don't want to keep the commander waiting! Apollo: Right! (Hops in his Viper and launches.) Damon: (Hopeful.) Aurora? Have you recovered from being twined by Jolly's kids? Aurora: (Glares.) No! Forget it, Damon! I'm still mad at men in general! (She flounces out.) Damon: (Yelling after her.) They're Cassie's kids too! [After a moment, Damon sneaks to the side of the bay and meets Paye and Zara, who have been hiding behind several convenient cargo cases just arrived from the Rising Star - which, of course, is how they got to the Celestra.] Damon: I did it! I hot-wired his engines! That's what I was supposed to do, right? Paye: Right. Zara: Tell me again why we're hot-wiring Apollo's engine? Paye: It's our duty as members of GETALIFE! Zara: Why? Paye: We've got to stop Starbuck from returning, as the prophecy foretold. Zara: What's that got to do with Apollo? Paye: We've got to stop Apollo from bringing him back. We all know Apollo - when his father sends him on a mission, he's on a mission! Whether he likes it or not! So to stop Starbuck from returning, we've got to stop Apollo from finding him! Right? Damon: Right! Gladly! Anything that prevents Starbuck from coming back is okay by me - I never want to see or hear of him again, and if I hear Aurora say "Starbuck would've done it this way" one more time, I'm going to space myself! Darn pilots.... Tune in for the next exciting episode of "Jolly Forgot the Kids" when we'll hear Adama ask, "When did you come back?" X-UIDL: ^S("!!`W!!`VYK"! "Jolly Forgot the Kids" - Episode 277 Scene: The bridge of the Galactica. The lights are red, the scene is tense, Adama and Tigh look worried, and you know what that means. Yup, the Cylons are attacking. Rigel: Sir! It's the Cylons! They're attacking! Five microns and closing! Adama: When did you come back? Rigel: As soon as I knew there was an attack coming, I knew I had to return to my post. Adama: Why? Rigel: It's the only time I get lines, sir. Adama: True.... Tigh: So where were you? Rigel: If you ask me that, I might have to talk about ... mushies. Tigh: But of course that's not important right now, what's important is that you're here, now, doing your job, when we need you. Rigel: I thought so, sir. Tigh: The Black Ovines are taking on the Cylons! Adama: The Black Ovines? But where's Blue Squadron? Tigh: Actually, sir, as soon as Apollo left, they all headed for the O Club. A third of 'em are now drunk, another third are naked because one of the waitresses threw baharri on 'em and they have to change, and the rest are lost in the conduits trying to escape the affections of another waitress. Adama: (Shaking his head.) Samson's really got to control his waitresses better. Tigh: They figured it was safe, since Apollo was gone. Nothing ever happens when he's not here. Adama: (Nodding reluctantly, but sagely - with wisdom, not spice.) And most of the time, it would be. But in this situation.... Rigel: I wonder how come the Black Ovines weren't in the O Club. Tigh: Probably because they're still based on the Featherstar and didn't know Apollo was gone. Rigel: Sir, we can hear the attack signals and battle chatter between the Black Ovines and the Cylons! Let's listen.... Boyington: Take that, you Cylons! We'll blow you out of the sky, and you'll never even know what hit you! Cylon #1: Nyah! Well, what we know and you don't is that we have Starbuck as a prisoner, and we're not going to let him go! So there! [Sound of explosions in space - yes, in space - and great fireworks on the front viewscreen of the bridge.] French: You've got Starbuck? You ... you meanies! Cylon #2: I am rubber, you are glue, it bounces off me and sticks to you. Casey: That beast! Cylon #3: I know you are, but what am I? Boyle: That does it, they're toast.... [Sound of more explosions.] Cylon #4: They got George! Now I'm mad, I'm blowing up somebody.... Boyington: Quick, get him before he gets- [Sound of yet another explosion and a very pretty light show.] Casey: Oh, no, they got him! Boyle: He's gone! I can't believe it! French: Life will never be the same.... Boyington: That Cylon's going to pay.... [Adama and Tigh exchange glances.] Tigh: A Cylon named George? Tune in for the next exciting episode of "Jolly Forgot the Kids" when we'll hear who the Cylon actually shot.